(That moment when you’re finally content with being single)
Wow. This….feels…amazing! For the first time in my life I am consistently happy and satisfied with being single. I say consistently, because usually it is an up and down roller coaster ride. One minute, I’m single and ready to mingle. The next minute, I just want that someone special in my life to call my own. Not this time. I am so content with just being by myself.
I know what you’re thinking, “Yeah right, I’ve heard that one before.” But I really am happy. I know the stresses and the headaches of a relationship, and I do not want to go through that again any time soon. Honestly, I think my last relationship scarred me in a way that leaves me feeling jaded by love. I am not going to throw my ex under the bus (although he did play a major part in my hurt); I can only blame myself. In short, I fell way too hard way too fast and I had taken my focus away from God. When the relationship came to an abrupt halt and we officially ended it (on my birthday, might I add) I was left with a broken heart and no clue how to put the pieces back together while he quickly moved on and began to talk to other girls.
Sad story right?
Honestly when our relationship ended my college life started! I actually began to go out and get the full college experience instead of staying in my dorm just so I can talk to my boyfriend. Now I understand why adults advised me not to go to college in a relationship. They don’t do anything but hold you back and stress you out (well that was my experience anyways)! I do not want to cry myself to sleep every night over some guy. I refuse to stay in on a Saturday night just to skype him when I could be out having fun. I will NOT be bound and chained into a relationship any time soon. Not until a guy comes along that is worth the stress that comes with a relationship, because people tend to forget that the honeymoon phase don’t last always…
So, now that I have all the time in the world to do whatever I want and not worry about the next chance I will get to see or talk to my significant other what do I do with all this free time? Well…
- I am focusing on my relationship with God and learning to depend on Him for all my needs
- I am focusing on being a better daughter, sister, and friend
- I am working on a blog that I have wanted to do for quit some time now
- I am planning the second annual Give Me Five: Young Women’s Conference that will take place this summer
- I am more focused on my school work than I have ever been!
- Etc. etc. etc.
The list goes on and on! When you stop thinking about not having a relationship and just enjoying your time of singleness, you will find that your joy does not have to come from a guy or girl.
I want to make a concluding statement that love is a beautiful thing! However, if you waste your time with the wrong person things can get really ugly really fast. A wise person once told me that you’re either dating your future ex or your husband. I don’t want a long list of ex’s and a whole bunch of baggage that I have to explain to my husband in the future. I am not going to waste my time and start a relationship when I can’t even see myself being with him for more than a month. I would rather keeps things simple and have a healthy, happy friendship with a guy than to lose his friendship through a nasty breakup.
So for now….no sex and no relationships for me and I’m ok with that.