I am tired.
As you can tell from my last post, dating has not been a fun experience for me. I have had a few contenders, but it never seems to go anywhere. It is like we do this tango of flirtation until I get tired of waiting for something more, something meaningful. Whatever happened to actually dating?
When I was a child I was taught when a guy and a girl are both interested in one another they spend quality time together. They go to the movies, go out for coffee, go out for dinner, or they just simply go for a walk. They have deeper conversations about their childhood and their dreams. They pick apart each other’s mind and evaluate each other’s character. It is all apart of the process of getting to know each other to see if they are someone you want to invest more of yourself into-emotionally, financially, spiritually, etc..
This, however, has not been my experience. We talk, we text, we flirt, he sends mixed signals. Then I loose interest and move on with my life. I don’t want to play the games it seems all the guys I talk to like to play.I know what I want…I just don’t seem to attract guys with those qualities.
I want to be taken out. I want to have a pleasant conversation where we share laughs and discuss something deeper than our favorite colors. I want someone who respects women. I want a hard worker full of dreams and ambition to chase those dreams. I want someone who I can trust around other attractive women, because he sees only me in a roomful. I want someone I can build with, not just physical things, but build to expand the kingdom of God here on earth. I want someone who loves God more than anything this world has to offer but still knows how to let loose and have a great time.
And I refuse to settle.
I am almost ready to quit this whole thing. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind being single. It is the dating part that sucks. I hate doing things that seem to lead me nowhere, but I will keep pushing through. I know I will eventually meet a guy who is tired of the games as well.
I never knew the dating scene could be so exhausting.